Today I had a lunch date with someone who looked and sounded great, but from the moment he picked me up, I could see - despite all the claims he made and successes he's had - that part of a frontal lobe must be missing. His goofy grin was complemented by a flatness in the eyes.
It was almost as if a brainwashing had occurred. How is it possible for a talented musician, composer, writer, photographer, teacher, comedian, champion racquetball player, and god knows what else, be born again, self-published, and obsessed by flying saucers?
We chatted about his 26 years as an army musician, 14-year career in music education and big band-dom in LA, his native American roots, multi-lingual abilities (German, Korean, Spanish). He didn't bring up his faith until I asked. I was curious to discover what made him tick.
He left the Catholic Church after high school because of the hypocrisy he found. Ten years later, post-divorce, an army buddy brought him back into the fold, apparently an evangelical groove. Now he aspires to be an apologist, one who defends the Christian faith, based on "true facts" found in the bible. He explained that a good apologist prepares for conversations by researching the questioners' backgrounds. He seemed to think this was brilliant, never questioning the ethics of using someone's personal history to manipulate them into believing.
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So there was no connecting to be done. Incompatible wiring. I wonder how he felt? He said we'll have to do this again when he dropped me off, but that too was flat.
He is the third person I've dated who presented me with a CD of his music on our first date. He's the second very talented man to pick me up in a messy van. Two of the three were alcoholics, one in recovery and one not. Of course the one I stayed with for six months was the active drinker. It makes a girl want to throw up her hands.
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Luckily, I had a video conversation with another potential suitor who I liked very much whose brand of sanity seems to match my own. Hopefully there will be more to follow!
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